443 | Why is it so Hard to Relax? with Stephanie Antoine

443 | Why is it so Hard to Relax? with Stephanie Antoine

In this episode, Eric is joined by Stephanie Antoine, a self-care and ADHD coach based in California and hails from London with roots in the Caribbean.  She spent many years studying meditation and yoga to reduce stress, chronic pain, and to keep things together before finally being diagnosed with ADHD at age 40. 

In addition to her professional work as a violinist, Stephanie is a qualified teacher of MBSR (Mindfulness-based Stress Reduction) from UMASS, practiced and trained to teach yoga at the Iyengar Institute of San Francisco and is an ACSM (American College of Sports Medicine) Personal Trainer with an ICF (International Coaching Federation) Coaching Certificate. 

You’ll hear Stephanie’s experience with burnout, being a mom, overwhelm, and overdoing without enough support.  Stephanie also talks about the ways her ADHD showed up in her life and the moments that led her to the path to discovering her ADHD and incorporating meditation in her life.  Then, Eric and Stephanie talk about the difficulties and engaging in practicing, and her experience of being a person of color in a very white space. 

Next, you’ll hear about Stephanie’s experience in straining to relax, why relaxing is necessary, why she was sent to a relaxation class, and the power of pausing.

Then, Stephanie and Eric discuss the pressures we face that make it difficult for us to relax, ways to build the muscle of observation, ways that Stephanie overcomes resistance to starting a difficult task, and the importance of curiosity when facing unpleasant or difficult moments and moments of boredom. 

Finally, you’ll hear about the difference between seeing and looking, Trataka meditation, why taking care of oneself is important and why self-care is not selfish. 

Visit Stephanie’s Website at

“We practice ‘practice’, we don’t practice results.”
– Phillip Moffitt 

Other Questions & Topics in this Episode: 

  • How did Stephanie experience burnout? 
  • What was it like for Stephanie being the only black person in primarily white spaces? 
  • Why is it so hard to relax? 

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